I've read another Tat-Ka-Tol Bhone Naing novel မ်က္ရည္ေလာကမ်ား၏ဟိုမွာဘက္ and once again I feel so devastated and disappointed after finishing it. Although I like his writing, why are his characters always so complex? May be it is due to generation difference, but I really hate that kind of endings :( .
And as usual, I think of you. I think that your mind might have been influenced by his books by seeing that you are more mature than me. Your thinking is always very different from me though we are of same age. Sometimes, I didn't like when you told me those strange and deep words that I couldn't comprehend. But I think I can understand you and your words now. (How did you even endure my childish behaviours and thinkings? )
I wonder whether I can move on completely without dwelling on past. I wonder whether I won't be doing second mistake again. I wonder, after all these pains, whether I can love a person so much like others. I wonder whether the person I am loving now .. loves me or not. I wonder whether we can be together even if we love each other. Future is a scary imagination, but just simply following my heart might break my heart in future. However, I feel so confused but I can't seem to stop loving him and missing him. :(
I am not guilty to love, but love comes with pain and I don't like it distracting me from my study. Oh. I don't really like my current self... really..
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